Do Not Read

An entry full of self pity. I told you not to read.

At the beginning of the year, I've been talking about travelling for my birthday. Unfortunately, due to lack of funds (this being the most minor of my problems) and the fear of the potential nagging from my mother (this being the biggest one -- I know, I know. sigh), I'm staying home on my birthday. How sad is it that a thirty year old woman has to dread the naggigng she's going to get from her mother? I think I'm 15 years too late to be sulking and rebellious but what else can someone with no life do? I wouldn't mind so much if only she didn't treat me like a (mostly empty) ATM machine as well. But as Bruce once said, what can you expect fro someone who grew up spoiled and rich and never had to work a day in her life? To make matters worse, she expects me to go to my nephew's birthday party ON MY BIRTHDAY. I'm sorry but I think I'm entitled notto give a flying **** about anybody but myself on my birthday. All my life, all I've wanted was to be left alone. Now, 30 years later, I'm still being nagged, coerced, threatened, and annoyed. No wonder I'm always so frowny and depressed. And no, I don't think the wrong parent died. I love my mother very much but sometimes, I wish I would just die so that she can collect my f***** insurance and I'd rest in peace. That way, everybody wins.